The thing is, Brendon doesn't plan it. It's not planned at all, which is so not like how Brendon saw this going down. Ever. Brendon has, okay, he's thought a lot about this, how it could happen. In his mind, there's always this moment when something changes. Something magical and big, and then Spencer would be looking at Brendon and see and Brendon would be looking at Spencer, too, and let him see, and then they both would move and then they'd kiss. Or Spencer would let Brendon see, would let Brendon catch him checking Brendon out. Or something.
The point is there should be something. A huge big moment when everything changes. Not ... this, whatever this is. This is Brendon standing in the kitchen area, angling for a cup, and Spencer coming up behind Brendon quiet like a mouse. Spencer's reaching for the Poptarts, and then they're both turning and suddenly, somehow, Brendon's lips brush Spencer's mouth and his cheek. It doesn't even register at first, but then Ian whoops and Dallon catcalls. Spencer laughs nervously, and Brendon finds himself giggling.
"Morning, sweetiepea," Spencer says, "do you want a Poptart?"
"Yeah," Brendon says and that's it. They finish getting breakfast and then they watch Zoolander for what is probably the thousandth time and everything goes back to normal. For Spencer, at least because he behaves normally and seems to actually forget about it entirely.
Brendon wishes he could do that, but ... he can't stop thinking about it. It's just--that was their first kiss and it was an accident and nothing came of it and Brendon's really fucking disappointed. He's trying not to let it show. He doesn't think he's particularly successful at it.
The next hotel night Brendon ends up with Spencer. That would be clue 1 because Brendon is sure it's Ian's turn. He puts his bag on the hotel bed next to the window. "First shower," he says, tries to make a joke of it, but Brendon doesn't want to be alone in a room with Spencer right now. He's afraid everything would just come spilling out of him if Spencer looks at him the right way.
"Okay," Spencer says. "Ian mentioned this awesome bar he knows nearby, wanna come with later?"
Ian didn't mention that bar to Brendon. Even though Brendon had talked to Ian about going out later, and Ian had made vague noises about maybe staying in that night. It doesn't make Brendon feel any better.
"No, I guess I'll have an early night." Brendon fakes a smile. "I want to take advantage of having an actual bed with a frame for once."
"Sure," Spencer says. He seems a bit subdued.
"Hey, do you want to have first shower then?"
Spencer contemplates that. "If you don't mind." He's not looking at Brendon, and Brendon wants to kick himself. And Spencer. It's not Spencer's fault, but he's this weird kind of upset with Spencer for fucking up all of Brendon's perfect fantasies.
"No, just go ahead."
Spencer nods tersely. When he's closed the bathroom door behind himself, Brendon collapses on the bed and groans. For something that's technically something, their "kiss" has fucked them up good. Brendon thinks he just needs to get a grip on himself. He needs to put his head back on straight and move the fuck on. It obviously didn't mean anything to anyone but Brendon, so he should just let go. Yep. He's getting on that first thing after Spencer's gone.
By the time Spencer's finished Brendon's fallen asleep on his bed. He wakes up slowly to Spencer carefully shaking him. "Hey, I'm going," Spencer says. "If anything, if you, I have my cell phone with me, okay?"
Brendon nods. "Sure, but I'm fine," he says.
"Yeah." Spencer doesn't look like he's believing Brendon one bit. "I'll see you later."
"Later," Brendon says. The hotel room seems strangely empty after Spencer's gone. Right, moving on now.
Not Kissed #1
***
The thing is, Brendon doesn't plan it. It's not planned at all, which is so not like how Brendon saw this going down. Ever. Brendon has, okay, he's thought a lot about this, how it could happen. In his mind, there's always this moment when something changes. Something magical and big, and then Spencer would be looking at Brendon and see and Brendon would be looking at Spencer, too, and let him see, and then they both would move and then they'd kiss. Or Spencer would let Brendon see, would let Brendon catch him checking Brendon out. Or something.
The point is there should be something. A huge big moment when everything changes. Not ... this, whatever this is. This is Brendon standing in the kitchen area, angling for a cup, and Spencer coming up behind Brendon quiet like a mouse. Spencer's reaching for the Poptarts, and then they're both turning and suddenly, somehow, Brendon's lips brush Spencer's mouth and his cheek. It doesn't even register at first, but then Ian whoops and Dallon catcalls. Spencer laughs nervously, and Brendon finds himself giggling.
"Morning, sweetiepea," Spencer says, "do you want a Poptart?"
"Yeah," Brendon says and that's it. They finish getting breakfast and then they watch Zoolander for what is probably the thousandth time and everything goes back to normal. For Spencer, at least because he behaves normally and seems to actually forget about it entirely.
Brendon wishes he could do that, but ... he can't stop thinking about it. It's just--that was their first kiss and it was an accident and nothing came of it and Brendon's really fucking disappointed. He's trying not to let it show. He doesn't think he's particularly successful at it.
The next hotel night Brendon ends up with Spencer. That would be clue 1 because Brendon is sure it's Ian's turn. He puts his bag on the hotel bed next to the window. "First shower," he says, tries to make a joke of it, but Brendon doesn't want to be alone in a room with Spencer right now. He's afraid everything would just come spilling out of him if Spencer looks at him the right way.
"Okay," Spencer says. "Ian mentioned this awesome bar he knows nearby, wanna come with later?"
Ian didn't mention that bar to Brendon. Even though Brendon had talked to Ian about going out later, and Ian had made vague noises about maybe staying in that night. It doesn't make Brendon feel any better.
"No, I guess I'll have an early night." Brendon fakes a smile. "I want to take advantage of having an actual bed with a frame for once."
"Sure," Spencer says. He seems a bit subdued.
"Hey, do you want to have first shower then?"
Spencer contemplates that. "If you don't mind." He's not looking at Brendon, and Brendon wants to kick himself. And Spencer. It's not Spencer's fault, but he's this weird kind of upset with Spencer for fucking up all of Brendon's perfect fantasies.
"No, just go ahead."
Spencer nods tersely. When he's closed the bathroom door behind himself, Brendon collapses on the bed and groans. For something that's technically something, their "kiss" has fucked them up good. Brendon thinks he just needs to get a grip on himself. He needs to put his head back on straight and move the fuck on. It obviously didn't mean anything to anyone but Brendon, so he should just let go. Yep. He's getting on that first thing after Spencer's gone.
By the time Spencer's finished Brendon's fallen asleep on his bed. He wakes up slowly to Spencer carefully shaking him. "Hey, I'm going," Spencer says. "If anything, if you, I have my cell phone with me, okay?"
Brendon nods. "Sure, but I'm fine," he says.
"Yeah." Spencer doesn't look like he's believing Brendon one bit. "I'll see you later."
"Later," Brendon says. The hotel room seems strangely empty after Spencer's gone. Right, moving on now.