![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Okay, rant ahead so be warned.
Not so long ago one of my friends left my house. She's not a close friend, we live on the same housing estate and her daughter is best friends with my son. Tonight she'd went out and left her live in partner babysitting. He phoned and told her she had 5 minutes to get home or else. She only goes out one night a week and was having a good time with her brother and friends, so decided to stay out a bit longer.
So she gets home and her partner is waiting livid with rage. He grabs her by her neck, throws her to the floor, takes her money and keys and generally rains verbal abuse on her. Did I mention this is in front of her 7 year old daughter? Then, and this makes me so fucking mad, he hides all of his daughters coats and chucks my friend, her little girl and the dog out of their home and locks them out. Yeah, his daughter is outside in her nightclothes at 9pm because her dad won't let her have a coat.
They come to mine, luckily I live only a minutes walk away, but what if I didn't? They have no money and K is in her pyjamas. L was sobbing as she phoned to try and find her mam, so she could go there for the night, while K was practically in shock, telling me her mam and dad had had a fight.
James was off so he could drive them to somewhere safe. Just after they left someone started banging on my window and I was so damn scared, thought it was L's partner. ( I was alone with my son) but it was L's brother who was fuming. He came back twice, in between he kicked the crap out of L's partner. Good.
But what gets me is in the car L was telling James what happened, and James told her to leave him, but she says that she loves him, and I know she'll go back. See, I don't get that. My mam was beaten up by one of her boyfriends when I was a kid, and I swore if anyone ever did that to me I'd be out of there.
But then again, what do I know? It's never happened to me, so until it does I can't judge. All I know is men that hit women make me sick.
Sorry for the self indulgent rant but I needed to vent.
Not so long ago one of my friends left my house. She's not a close friend, we live on the same housing estate and her daughter is best friends with my son. Tonight she'd went out and left her live in partner babysitting. He phoned and told her she had 5 minutes to get home or else. She only goes out one night a week and was having a good time with her brother and friends, so decided to stay out a bit longer.
So she gets home and her partner is waiting livid with rage. He grabs her by her neck, throws her to the floor, takes her money and keys and generally rains verbal abuse on her. Did I mention this is in front of her 7 year old daughter? Then, and this makes me so fucking mad, he hides all of his daughters coats and chucks my friend, her little girl and the dog out of their home and locks them out. Yeah, his daughter is outside in her nightclothes at 9pm because her dad won't let her have a coat.
They come to mine, luckily I live only a minutes walk away, but what if I didn't? They have no money and K is in her pyjamas. L was sobbing as she phoned to try and find her mam, so she could go there for the night, while K was practically in shock, telling me her mam and dad had had a fight.
James was off so he could drive them to somewhere safe. Just after they left someone started banging on my window and I was so damn scared, thought it was L's partner. ( I was alone with my son) but it was L's brother who was fuming. He came back twice, in between he kicked the crap out of L's partner. Good.
But what gets me is in the car L was telling James what happened, and James told her to leave him, but she says that she loves him, and I know she'll go back. See, I don't get that. My mam was beaten up by one of her boyfriends when I was a kid, and I swore if anyone ever did that to me I'd be out of there.
But then again, what do I know? It's never happened to me, so until it does I can't judge. All I know is men that hit women make me sick.
Sorry for the self indulgent rant but I needed to vent.
no subject
It must be so difficult if you love someone, to make that decision to leave the second man . I know it's possible to love someone but not their behaviour. My mam has a drinking problem, and while I love her, I hate how she behaves.
I'm happy that as a family you were strong enough to make him leave once he became physically abusive. No one has the right to hit another person in anger. I'm glad that you have the ability to see him as a friend now while still maintaining mistrust. That seems very wise to me.
But yeah, abusive partners just suck, and I hate that it happens
Yeah, totally. But I can see reading your story that on some occasions people might not be able to leave, that does help me understand a little.
I hope you've achieved happiness in your life now. Thanks again for sharing.
no subject
Yes, I think that's a big factor.
It must be so difficult if you love someone, to make that decision to leave the second man . I know it's possible to love someone but not their behaviour. My mam has a drinking problem, and while I love her, I hate how she behaves.
You do know how it feels. *hugs*
I'm glad that you have the ability to see him as a friend now while still maintaining mistrust. That seems very wise to me.
We have a daughter together so I feel I must be nice, but it's really not a huge hardship.
I hope you've achieved happiness in your life now. Thanks again for sharing.
Thanks for listening.
I hope your friend is okay.