turps: (Pecker (pensnest))
turps ([personal profile] turps) wrote2007-11-26 11:45 am
Entry tags:

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Despite the fact that I couldn't get to the popslash get together, I was virtually included in the plans to test the MTYG code. Which meant being assigned a recipient and a request deliberately designed to be insane. eta: Or not. It seems it was them being them *g* I was assigned [livejournal.com profile] nopseud who asked for Joey/Brian or AJ/Nick and something involving sexy talking dolphins, which yeah.

Blame those crazy Uk popslashers!



“Is that a dolphin?” Joey asked, taking a step toward the giant glass tank set up in Brian’s yard. “Because if it is, you do know it’s illegal to keep them as pets.”

Brian grinned, and slung his arm around Joey’s shoulder. “Would I keep a dolphin as a pet?”

Which was reassuring for all of a second; until the moment a dolphin arched gracefully into the air, causing a wave of water to cascade to the soggy ground.

Joey blinked, rubbed his eyes, hoped it was a mass hallucination brought on by too much sun. The dolphin remained. “You’ve got a giant fish in your yard.”

“Oh hey now, less of the fish insults.”

Joey felt Brian’s fingers tighten around his upper arm, as if holding him in place.

“He didn’t mean it, man.” Brian grinned and looked up at Joey. “He forgets that some people aren’t up on their marine knowledge.”

“I do not forget!” The dolphin slapped a fin against the surface of the water, causing hundreds of glimmering droplets that spun through the air. “It’s just. How hard is it to know the difference between a fish and a mammal? Trout. A fish. Salmon. A fish. Bass. A fish. And not your Bass, you moron. The fish bass. Dolphin. A mammal. See how easy that is? Fuck, it’s not difficult.”

The dolphin seemed genuinely angry, its beady eyes bulging and its mouth snapping open and closed. Except, Joey had spent over half his life around people who lived to deceive, and there was something in the dolphin’s expression. The way it wiggled in the water, its tail swishing just below the surface, like it was laughing throughout its whole body.

He stared at the dolphin. The dolphin stared back.

It was like a thousand staring contests before, except this time his opponent had no eyelids, which admittedly was a huge advantage.

“Brian,” Joey said, scrubbing the heel of his hand across his dry eyes. “Your dolphin sucks.”

Brian shuddered then, and dropped his hand to cover his groin. “No man, he doesn’t.”

“It’s my teeth; they’re kinda stumpy and sharp.” The dolphin sounded apologetic, and its fin slumped. “It was bad. Kevin had to …”

Brian held up his hand, looking pained. “We agreed to never mention that again.”

“Oh, right.” The dolphin submerged then, bubbles rippling to the surface, and Joey didn’t have to be a marine expert to know it was laughing. When it surfaced again, flipper casually hooked over the lip of the tank, snout in the air, it looked directly at Joey. “I can do other things though. I’m awesome with my tongue, and once you’ve gone blow hole you’ll never go back.”

“Brian,” Joey said slowly. “Your dolphin is coming onto me.”

“I know.” Brian wiggled his hand under Joey’s t-shirt, resting his palm against the small of Joey’s back. “I told him to.” He turned a little then, stretched up and brushed a kiss against the underside of Joey’s jaw. “Well?”

Joey looked at the dolphin, the way it was running its flipper along the glass, at Brian, who smiled wide, his hand warm against Joey’s back.

Like Joey could say no.






I know Pen has posted her story from this weekend, and believe me. It's worth checking out *g*
nopseud: (Default)

[personal profile] nopseud 2007-11-26 12:14 pm (UTC)(link)
HEEEEEEEEEE!

This story just does not get any less cracktastically fabulous with re-reading.

BLOWHOLE!

{mourns lack of JC/dolphin icon}

(Mind you, the insane requests weren't a necessary part of the testing. They were just, you know. Us.)
ext_1650: (DR Mikey2)

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-11-26 12:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Mind you, the insane requests weren't a necessary part of the testing. They were just, you know. Us

Which is something I totally believe :)

You know, one positive of being here last weekend. I doubt I would have been able to write where people could see. At least this way you got your sexy dolphin. And yes, that icon would have been perfect!
nopseud: (Default)

[personal profile] nopseud 2007-11-26 05:16 pm (UTC)(link)
I doubt I would have been able to write where people could see.

And that would have been a terrible loss to the blowhole porn genre!

(Poor [livejournal.com profile] randomling sat and wrote her first sex scene while we all watched and heckled offered useful nouns and adjectives.)
sperrywink: (Dude where's our car?)

[personal profile] sperrywink 2007-11-26 12:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh my god, that's just filthy and the funniest thing I've read in forever.
Ahahahaha!
ext_1650: (chris purple.)

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-11-26 03:25 pm (UTC)(link)
What can I say? If a sexy dolphin is asked for, blowholes come to mind *G*
pensnest: bright-eyed baby me (Joey Yay!)

[personal profile] pensnest 2007-11-26 01:39 pm (UTC)(link)
There are so few people in fandom who could ever have written the words once you’ve gone blow hole you’ll never go back.

Ahahahahaha!
ext_1650: (chris purple.)

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-11-26 03:25 pm (UTC)(link)
*is proud*

I like to think the spirit of the get together reached this far north *g*

[identity profile] phaballa.livejournal.com 2007-11-26 02:21 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh dear GOD. This could not be more awesome (unless it contained a side of JC/Lynn, of course). Once you've gone blowhole you never go back. FOR THE WIN!
ext_1650: (pete close up equanimousicons)

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-11-26 03:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh man, a side of JC/Lynn would be perfect!
ext_312: Desolation Row!Gerard (Default)

[identity profile] turloughishere.livejournal.com 2007-11-26 02:57 pm (UTC)(link)
*snerk* This is just hilarious!! I love Brian's dolphin!!
ext_1650: (MCR (turloughishere))

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-11-26 03:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Brian's getting quite a collection of pets it seems *g*
randomling: A wombat. (joey)

[personal profile] randomling 2007-11-26 04:46 pm (UTC)(link)
Truly, truly fabulous - I mean, seriously. Dolphin sex! *grins*
ext_1650: (Governess Mikey ( turloughishere ))

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-11-27 07:13 am (UTC)(link)
Dolphin sex FTW!
ext_9595: (Default)

[identity profile] bubbleforest.livejournal.com 2007-11-26 05:35 pm (UTC)(link)
Bwaaahahaha! The blowhole line is ridiculously brilliant. I love that Brian has all the sex-crazed animals - first Pecker, now a dolphin!

Joey/Brian and dolphins is the perfect combination. Loved this! *g*
ext_1650: (MCR (turloughishere))

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-11-27 07:13 am (UTC)(link)
Hee! I know! It makes you wonder what it is about Brian that people give him these sex-crazed pets *g*

I'm glad you enjoyed :D
rikes: drawing of a fairy, with cherry blossoms (Default)

[personal profile] rikes 2007-11-26 09:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh my god. OH MY GOD. Terri, you kill me! :D
ext_1650: (Governess Mikey ( turloughishere ))

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-11-27 07:11 am (UTC)(link)
I knew you'd appreciate it! :D

[identity profile] msktrnanny.livejournal.com 2007-11-27 01:09 am (UTC)(link)
I love you, but I am SCARRED!!!
ext_1650: (DR Mikey2)

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-11-27 07:10 am (UTC)(link)
But blowhole sex is a natural thing!

*smooch*
frausorge: painting of a gray-faced figure in a maroon suit with shocked bulging eyes (believe)

[personal profile] frausorge 2007-11-27 06:52 am (UTC)(link)
I AM VERY, VERY FRIGHTENED.
ext_1650: (MCR (turloughishere))

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-11-27 07:09 am (UTC)(link)
But Brian loves his dolphin! *g*

[identity profile] x--kes--x.livejournal.com 2007-11-27 11:25 am (UTC)(link)
I can't really think of a comment to do this justice other than you win at crack!fic.

wow.

awesome.
ext_1650: (DR Mikey2)

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-11-27 01:55 pm (UTC)(link)
Hee! Glad you enjoyed.

Thanks for the comment :)

[identity profile] chrismm.livejournal.com 2007-11-28 12:40 am (UTC)(link)
*comes in late, as usual* Oh my God. I love your brain. *gleee!!*
ext_1650: (Pete By <lj user="marauder_bex"> at <lj)

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-12-03 02:56 pm (UTC)(link)
What have I told you before? You're never too late.

Thank you!

[identity profile] vaudevilles.livejournal.com 2007-11-28 02:37 am (UTC)(link)
once you’ve gone blow hole you’ll never go back.

Can't I go back? Are you sure?

*gurgles madly, but not in the least like a drowning dolphin*
ext_1650: (M-B-G borgs ( turloughishere))

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-12-03 02:54 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, maybe you can go back. Because you're you and you're awesome.

*smooch*

[identity profile] ephemera.livejournal.com 2007-11-28 03:50 pm (UTC)(link)
“Brian,” Joey said slowly. “Your dolphin is coming onto me.” - this sentence is one of the very many reasons that I love and adore you.
ext_1650: (Governess Mikey ( turloughishere ))

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-12-03 02:53 pm (UTC)(link)
You know even dolphins find Joey sexy *g*

[identity profile] ninjetti75.livejournal.com 2007-12-05 05:59 am (UTC)(link)
Wow with the crack. But it is awesome crack, nonetheless!

And am I the only one who thinks the dolphin must be Nick? Maybe I'm channeling my MX crack!xover too much, hee...
ext_1650: (Blue Pete ( tragic_icons))

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2007-12-09 11:08 pm (UTC)(link)
I love you so much! That is so Nick!

You're the only one that got that too *g*

[identity profile] puszysty.livejournal.com 2008-06-01 01:42 am (UTC)(link)
I have been scarred for life!
ext_1650: (Governess Mikey ( turloughishere ))

[identity profile] turps33.livejournal.com 2008-06-01 08:15 am (UTC)(link)
But blow hole sex is the best kind of sex!

[identity profile] puszysty.livejournal.com 2008-06-01 06:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Clearly I have been missing out on something.