Happy birthday, Corey!
Feb. 11th, 2016 03:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
turpsAs it's the actual day. Happy birthday to the kidlet. I can't believe Corey's now twenty years old. Way to make me feel ancient, kidlet.
And because it never gets old, I have to link to some of the first pics we had of him in the nicu. In his little spotted sailor suit. With James and me
I forgot to say, James is feeling much better now and went back to work today. I suspect he'll still need to see the foot specialist at some point, but it's become something that happens when it happens and not an emergency as it was starting to look like last week.
Yesterday Pauline got a growth taken off her face and it wasn't cancer, so that's great news, too.
Thinking of. She finally got a letter yesterday that suggests dad's will issues are very close to being sorted out.
I've said previously that dad had his funeral paid for and a will arranged a very long time ago. Sadly the will part of it fell apart towards the end of last year. He had the most of his savings in premium bonds, and when he found out he had incurable cancer intended to cash those in. Sadly with the fall he never got to do that, and everything ended up in a mess.
Pauline tried her best to sort things out, but she just couldn't. There were too many things she couldn't deal with in terms of tax on the bonds and other matters that really dragged her down. She didn't want to use a solicitor as it would have meant money being taken out of dad's estate, but in the end I just told her to do it, the money it was going to cost was well worth her mental health.
So she did, and yesterday she finally got a letter which means dad's money will be divided between me, my brother and Pauline soon.
It's not a huge amount, but enough I can get some things done in the house and still hold onto a savings cushion, something I've never had. I've got a vague list of the things I want, but still feel a little bad when thinking of them because even though I know dad wanted us to have this money, I'd give back every future penny to have him back.
One of those things is to buy a new sofa. I keep thinking of how dad could never sit on ours as it's so low, and how I'd always have to bring a kitchen chair in for him, and he'd then eat his pie and scatter crumbs everywhere. So now I want a new one, not just because of what I said above, but because while the one we have is comfortable enough while I have the money I'd like to get something big and squishy and long lasting. So you know, if any of you UK people have any tips about where to buy a good sofa, or where to avoid, do tell.
Another bad thing about dad's money. Because Pauline and dad weren't married she's getting none of his pension from the fire-service. They were together nearly 25 years and he paid into that pension through all of his career and all they said to her was, no marriage certificate, no pension money. Dad though he'd arranged everything perfectly so she'd be looked after once he was gone, and I'm sure if he'd have known this would happen a quickie marriage would have happened.
Fannish stuff. I'm loving Mikey's hair style right now, and I appreciate the shoulder porn going on.
The first thing I saw logging on this morning waswenchpixie linking to Gerard's rendition of Superstar which I very much enjoyed listening to.
Thinking of those two, I must finish my picfor1000.
A03 is having a Feedback fest which is a very excellent thing.
And I'm sure I had another thing to mention but the window cleaner has just been and totally disrupted my train of thought.
ETA: I've just been talking to mam. She's been reading the comments on Corey's wall and said how weird it was James posted a post ending love from dad. She thought it should say love from mam and dad. But I never use my FB account and James uses his loads. Plus, I've already talked to and texted Corey today. I don't think there's an issue at all with how he ended his post, but she thinks it makes it sound like Corey hasn't got a mam. I swear, she can twist the simplest things at times.
And because it never gets old, I have to link to some of the first pics we had of him in the nicu. In his little spotted sailor suit. With James and me
I forgot to say, James is feeling much better now and went back to work today. I suspect he'll still need to see the foot specialist at some point, but it's become something that happens when it happens and not an emergency as it was starting to look like last week.
Yesterday Pauline got a growth taken off her face and it wasn't cancer, so that's great news, too.
Thinking of. She finally got a letter yesterday that suggests dad's will issues are very close to being sorted out.
I've said previously that dad had his funeral paid for and a will arranged a very long time ago. Sadly the will part of it fell apart towards the end of last year. He had the most of his savings in premium bonds, and when he found out he had incurable cancer intended to cash those in. Sadly with the fall he never got to do that, and everything ended up in a mess.
Pauline tried her best to sort things out, but she just couldn't. There were too many things she couldn't deal with in terms of tax on the bonds and other matters that really dragged her down. She didn't want to use a solicitor as it would have meant money being taken out of dad's estate, but in the end I just told her to do it, the money it was going to cost was well worth her mental health.
So she did, and yesterday she finally got a letter which means dad's money will be divided between me, my brother and Pauline soon.
It's not a huge amount, but enough I can get some things done in the house and still hold onto a savings cushion, something I've never had. I've got a vague list of the things I want, but still feel a little bad when thinking of them because even though I know dad wanted us to have this money, I'd give back every future penny to have him back.
One of those things is to buy a new sofa. I keep thinking of how dad could never sit on ours as it's so low, and how I'd always have to bring a kitchen chair in for him, and he'd then eat his pie and scatter crumbs everywhere. So now I want a new one, not just because of what I said above, but because while the one we have is comfortable enough while I have the money I'd like to get something big and squishy and long lasting. So you know, if any of you UK people have any tips about where to buy a good sofa, or where to avoid, do tell.
Another bad thing about dad's money. Because Pauline and dad weren't married she's getting none of his pension from the fire-service. They were together nearly 25 years and he paid into that pension through all of his career and all they said to her was, no marriage certificate, no pension money. Dad though he'd arranged everything perfectly so she'd be looked after once he was gone, and I'm sure if he'd have known this would happen a quickie marriage would have happened.
Fannish stuff. I'm loving Mikey's hair style right now, and I appreciate the shoulder porn going on.
The first thing I saw logging on this morning was
wenchpixie linking to Gerard's rendition of Superstar which I very much enjoyed listening to.Thinking of those two, I must finish my picfor1000.
A03 is having a Feedback fest which is a very excellent thing.
And I'm sure I had another thing to mention but the window cleaner has just been and totally disrupted my train of thought.
ETA: I've just been talking to mam. She's been reading the comments on Corey's wall and said how weird it was James posted a post ending love from dad. She thought it should say love from mam and dad. But I never use my FB account and James uses his loads. Plus, I've already talked to and texted Corey today. I don't think there's an issue at all with how he ended his post, but she thinks it makes it sound like Corey hasn't got a mam. I swear, she can twist the simplest things at times.
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Date: 2016-02-11 07:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-02-12 07:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-02-11 07:59 pm (UTC)(I'm kidding, of course, it's just that I never pictured Corey entering his 20s! Also, those are some super cute baby photos).
Ugh, I can't believe that Pauline was denied your father's pension. It's just horrid, you know? All said, though, it was definitely a good call for her to engage the services of a lawyer. Settling up people's affairs after their passing can be super confusing (not to mention also v. painful).
Mikeyway's do is so lovely that now I'm truly side-eyeing his insistence on wearing those tacky baseball hats. The shaved sides are ultra-flattering to his bone structure (this is NOT a very easy look to carry). It also makes his eyebrows and eyes pop--though I'm LOLing at his brave attempt at growing facial hair (Way bros' wanna-be beards will always be patchy af).
Gerard's cover of "Superstar" was really something else *___*
*hugs*
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Date: 2016-02-12 07:03 pm (UTC)I feel so bad for Pauline, and even though it doesn't affect him now, for dad too, because he went out of his way to try and ensure everything would be hassle free after his death -- and now this.
Yes! I so agree about Mikey and those hats. I know he's always enjoyed a good hat but the baseball kind are not flattering to him at all. He's got very striking looks and beautiful eyes, why overshadow that with those hats? I don't get it. Or the facial hair. I guess we have to admire the effort if nothing else.
It was so good. I'm pleased I downloaded it because I've been repeatedly listening today. Gerard really does have a beautiful voice.
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Date: 2016-02-11 08:34 pm (UTC)What a mess our legal system gets in over wills and things, it just makes a hard time harder - I hope it all gets sorted out soon ♥ (and enjoying his legacy doesn't mean you don't want him back, it's really very separate and nothing to feel guilt about).
I hadn't seen feedback fest - that looks excellent :D
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Date: 2016-02-12 06:58 pm (UTC)I felt so bad for Pauline trying to sort out the issue with the will. She went out of her way to keep me and my brother involved at every point, but it just got too much for her. And thank you for saying that ♥
Feedback fest looks like a very excellent thing. I need to think of some recs to make myself.
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Date: 2016-02-11 11:37 pm (UTC)Happy birthday to the birthday young man!
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Date: 2016-02-12 05:02 pm (UTC)Thank you!
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Date: 2016-02-12 01:18 am (UTC)It seems very cruel that Pauline gets nothing from the pension scheme. Can the solicitor who's doing the probate ask for the scheme to reconsider? It might well be worth pushing a bit rather than just accepting their immediate decision.
Enjoy the money, when you get it. In my experience, our elders generally want to be sure they can bequeath their children/grandchildren something, so using it is exactly what he would have wanted you to do.
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Date: 2016-02-12 07:10 pm (UTC)It's the pension situation that sits so wrong with me. Dad was so sure Pauline would be taken care of, and in fact after his death wheels were in motion for her to get the money. That is until she told them they'd never married and suddenly it was a big, nope. I think she should push too. But at the time she was overwhelmed with everything that happened.
Yeah, you're right. And in fact in the past dad has given me money just because he wanted life to be easier for us. I'll be thinking of him when I find my new couch.
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Date: 2016-02-13 04:34 pm (UTC)It's awful that Pauline isn't getting any money from his pension. Having lived together for that long should count just as much as a silly piece of paper!!
Good luck finding a nice couch! Since I don't live in the UK I don't have any other good advice than to not forget about IKEA. Most of their couches are excellent quality for the price. And think ahead, you're not getting younger and sooner or later you too will have trouble with those too-low couches ;-)
I knew I forgot something! That hair makes Mikey look perpetually startled :-)
Good luck with the story! *waves pompoms*
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Date: 2016-02-13 05:37 pm (UTC)I totally agree. Dad never wanted to get married again -- I think mam scared him off that big style -- but I'm positive if he knew Pauline would lose his pension he'd have done it anyway. It's frustrates me a lot that all of that money he paid into his pension has been lost completely.
Someone recommended Ikea for couches over at LJ. And in fact I was just there on Monday and had a try of a few and I did like them. They felt sturdy but still comfortable. You're also right about us not getting younger. That's why I want to spend the money when I have it on something that has lasting quality, and yeah, is higher.
Ahahaha, it does. But it is a good look for him. I just wish he'd show it off more often and keep away from the ball caps.
Thank you. I need to get cracking and get it done already.
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Date: 2016-02-13 07:34 pm (UTC)That's such a harsh decision about the pension stuff - I assume she got the lawyer involved to argue back?
**hugs**
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Date: 2016-02-29 12:57 pm (UTC)Nope, Pauline hasn't involved a lawyer. I wanted her to, but she just wasn't up to it. Which I can understand but it pains me that all of dad's money has gone to the govenment.