(no subject)

[turps]

I've just woke up after the best sleep. Nearly 12 uninterrupted hours. After practically face planting onto my keyboard last night I went to bed at a time I'd usually scoff at, read my book for ten minutes then didn't know anything more until twenty minutes ago. Even then I would have slept more except for a cracked out dream I had.

Man, that book. The Idol series cracks me up. I know slash stories tend to be pretty unrealistic but I hope that goes for the these too. The book I'm reading now has one of the worst euphemisms for penis ever. Man meat. Who the hell calls a penis their man meat? I know the books are written as gay fantasies, so they would be harsher than normal. But when I read things like 'grunting Pablo thrust his rosy man meat into Justin's gaping arsehole' I couldn't do anything but laugh. And yes, he was called Justin, I wasn't making that up *g* The book I'm reading now also has an addiction to hairy men, which is okay, but what isn't is saying things like 'naked, Scott stood up, showing off his body covered in a thick black mat of fur.' Fur! What is he? A wookie?

Hahaha, just asked James if he'd call his penis man meat. He looked at me and said 'this isn't for another of your porny stories is it?' Poor guy's used to being asked weird questions now *g*

Have to go get ready now. We're going Christmas shopping at the MetroCenter, and I *don't* want to go. I want to stay home and finish mailing Mouse :(

Comments

[castalie.livejournal.com]

Nice to hear you were able to have a real night *g*

Yes! I was waiting for a report on the Idol series! lol And ew, 'man meat'? Talk about a not attrative word! Well, for *us*. I just hate this word... like there's an expression to say 'jerk off' using 'beat off his meat' or something like that, I'm not sure of the correct order or anything, I just read it twice in a fic, and I really hate it.

Ahhh Christmas shopping... well, I'd like you to finish mailing this Mouse, indeed, but christmas shopping has a nice ring to it *eg* It's better start now than on Christmas Eve or something lol

[lindas-muse.livejournal.com]

At least your husband will talk to you about it. Mine would give me the cold shoulder.
8-/

[nopseud]

'rosy man meat'. Haaaahahahaaaaa!

See, I've read professionally published porn written by a gay male friend, and he was really anxious in case the very explicit sex was too much for my delicated female sensibilities. I got several detailed warnings about it all and how it was going to traumtise me. And then I just didn't have the heart to tell him it made me laugh out loud for almost all of the story. What *is* it with male-written porn and stupid euphemisms? I know there's a lot of very bad female-written slash out there suffering from the same thing, but honestly.

GAH!

[ninjetti75.livejournal.com]

*snort*

Hmm, how in the world do I address ANY of this?

Lessee, I think California Valley Guy will do. (And Cali guys aren't _necessarily_ like this, ask Jen, though I know a few who ARE, scarily enough...)

*ahem*

This is, like, TOTALly the most ridiculous junk I've ever heard? Or something? I mean, using euphimisms is one thing, y'know, but, like, "man meat"? WhatEVer!!

Honestly, euphemisms have their uses, but pretty much only as an alternative to a simile or metaphor, IMO. And no humility here, I've been writing for just over ten years now, and quite a bit of that has been smut (sad to say?) I can safely say I'm a male writer who does NOT use such phrases in his porn. Terri, back me up, can I write smut? *yeesh* And this crap gets someone PAID to write it? I need an agent, already...

[turps33.livejournal.com]

Nice to hear you were able to have a real night *g*

It was a perfect nights sleep. I really should go to bed before 1 am more often *g*

I'll give you a more detailed report later about the books, don't want to gross out LJ more, but yeah, man meat is disgusting. It's just such a stupid thing that all I could do was laugh, and I'm sure that wasn't the response the writer was wanting.

LOL, that mouse's mail will be finished some time tonight. Christmas shopping was good, the malls were busy but it was all so pretty that I didn't really mind.

[turps33.livejournal.com]

At least your husband will talk to you about it. Mine would give me the cold shoulder

I'm so lucky with that I know. He won't read my stuff but he doesn't mind talking about it on occasions. I couldn't imagine having to hide what I wrote from him.

[turps33.livejournal.com]

'rosy man meat'. Haaaahahahaaaaa!

Exactly my reaction *g* It was supposed to be an erotic sex scene and all I could do was sit there and laugh.

I've read a fair few books from the Idol series now, and most made me laugh at some point. There have been some good titles but most stick to the stupid euphemisms and it ruins the story. Even if the plot's good I can't take it seriously if evey sex scene's talking about man fat and matted body hair...ick!

It would be bad enough in fanfic but professionally published writers should know better.

You know next time there's a discussion on list about come vs cum I should write in and say, think that's bad? Try man fat instead. That would shut them up *g*

Re: GAH!

[turps33.livejournal.com]

I'd vouch for your smut anyday, Josh. Your work is much better than this stuff. You write hot sex scenes, these don't.

I'd rather read a good slashfic than one of these professional books any day. I suppose they're written for different audiences, the Idol books are little more than porn with a plot interwoven, a good slash story is so much more than that.

[lindas-muse.livejournal.com]

He knows I write and read it... He's fine with it as long as he doesn't have to deal with it.. as in asking questions like you do.. LOL... I have another friend who can talk to her husband like you do, too.
^_^

[nopseud]

Man fat? I just...no, I don't think I even want to ask.