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[turps]

I got a very lovely and unexpected gift from sperrywink. My own Magic Mike XXL mug. Happiness. It's also giving me inspiration as I'm seriously thinking about joining the small fandom big bang and writing strippers in Spaaaaaaace!

It was mam's birthday yesterday and my niece's the day before. We've bought our niece a Dan and Phil backpack, which has only arrived today, but forwarded her the link to the video Dan and Phil send when you order from their shop. This resulted in social media posts saying she was literally shaking. She really wanted the backpack but doesn't know that's what we've bought, so I suspect more shaking will be going on soon.

Autumn seems to be arriving, which makes me happy as it's my favourite season. The trees are starting to turn, it's nippy at night, and the greenhouse is full of red tomatoes. We've also got a lot of cucumbers, so much so James is giving them away to neighbours.

It was my next

I met the surgeon this morning, though it was a pretty pointless meeting as normally this is the meeting where they make sure you've met the weight loss target, and if you have, arrange the operation. In my case I've already got the date to get the balloon. I'll be going in on the 22nd and as long as there's no complications, should only be in overnight.

The surgeon was such a lovely, reassuring man. Though he did say that in nearly every case people put weight back on after the balloon. Apparently it's pretty much inevitable, it's just a case of ensuring it's not too much.

What frustrated me this appointment is even though I'm feeling so much better physically, the actual weight lost isn't reflecting how I feel. I have so much more energy, can see my body is changing, the seat belt in the car fits so much better, I walked so much the other day and despite my aching legs at the end of it, coped okay. So why isn't the weight loss reflecting that? It's coming off, sure, but considering how overweight I actually am it could be so much faster. It's not something that's getting me down or anything, I'm plodding on regardless, just annoying and frustrating, really.

So, a few weeks and I'm taking that first, big significant step.

Comments

[sperrywink]

{{{hugs}}}

I feel you on the weight loss not reflecting how you feel. That is the way I felt the entire time I was biking, but didn't loss any weight. So frustrating, but so it goes.

Good luck with the balloon and everything.

YAY mug! Strippers in spaaaaace would be beyond delightful, as I mentioned earlier. Dooooooo iiiiiit!!!

[turps]

♥

It's all kinds of frustrating, and can totally understand how you felt back then. I guess I need to just focus on the fact that I do feel much better.

Thank you. I'm just glad it's only an overnight stay. My FiL and MiL are coming to stay when I'm in hospital as James needs help with some things at home. Problem is, neither of them can get up off our couch. I can see them both sitting on the kitchen chairs.

Strippers in Spaaaaaace! I'm still seriously thinking about it. Shake the tiny fandom up with the first AU *g*

[nopseud]

If you're doing a lot more exercise than before, then you'll be building up extra muscle as you're losing fat. If that's the case, then because muscle tissue is denser than fat tissue, you'll lose volume much faster than you do mass, as it were.

I just looked it up -- muscle tissue density is 1.1 g/ml and fat density is 0.9 g/ml.

So, if you lost 15kg of fat then there'd be 16,500 cubic cm less of you (that sounds so weird).

If you lost 20kg of fat but also gained 5kg of muscle, then you'd lose exactly the same 15kg of weight, but the loss of volume would be 17,500 cubic cm (still sounds weird). And you'd still have 20kg less fat tissue!

I hope that makes sense. Also, I hope I got my maths right!

[turps]

First off, let me say how delighted I am at the idea that I have muscles. Obviously I know that I do have them being as I move around and such like, but as they're buried in flab I don't tend to see them, so it's a nice thought.

I have been getting out much more, so what you're saying makes sense. I mean, I can look at myself in the mirror and see clothes are hanging loose where they weren't before so obviously something is changing. Then I get put on the scales and expect so much more.

I really need to focus more on how I feel and not numbers, so, thank you for researching that. And for the maths, which I'm sure is right.

[pensnest]

I was going to say the same thing, only without the actual measurements. Feeling healthier and being able to do more is the real test, and yes, somewhere your muscles are growing!

Have you been measuring yourself? It could be worth taking measurements like thighs, waist, hips, to see if there's an encouraging change there. It sounds as though there should be.

[chalcopyrite]

That's a very inspiring mug! :D

I was going to say much the same as nopseud already has: if you feel better, have more energy, and can do more, that's the part to focus on, not the number on the scale. (To do her maths another way: muscle tissue is 22% denser than fat.)

[turps]

It's a very excellent mug.

if you feel better, have more energy, and can do more, that's the part to focus on, not the number on the scale.

I'm trying to do that, and do feel so much better.

Thank you!

[omens]

It sounds like you're already taking steps! <3<3<3 It also sounds frustrating.. I'm glad you can see through all the bullshit. (((<3)))

[turps]

Steps have been taken. Positive ones too I think.

Thank you!

[doctor_jasley]

dude, strippers in space sounds like a grand idea. DOOO IT *cheeeers* *shakes pom poms of glitter*

FALLL...I wish it would get here sooner. It's still way too damn hot and muggy. Stupid south.

*hugs* it does get frustrating when numbers don't go down after all the work you've put in. You're doing excellent.

<3

[turps]

Strippers in space would be awesome! I just need to sort myself out so I'm in a writing headspace again.

I love autumn so much. Has fall hit for you yet?

♥

[doctor_jasley]

*cuddles* finding a writing headspace is difficult sometimes.

Yesterday was chilly and dreary, so for the moment, yes..but IDK if the weather will go back hot then drop to winter or not. We'll see :)

[eledhwenlin]

*hugs*

To repeat what everyone else already said: just focus on how you feel, not on the numbers. I know that's hard. <333

[turps]

To repeat what everyone else already said: just focus on how you feel, not on the numbers. I know that's hard. <333

I've been trying.

Thank you ♥

[turlough]

Kimberly really gives the BEST presents!

Strippers in Spaaaace with lots of hurt/comfort sounds just like your kind of story.

We still seem to have summer here. It's still warm enough to sit on the balcony on knit in the afternoons.

Your tomatoes have finally turned red, yay!

I'll keep everything crossed on the 22nd!

It must feel very frustrating when what you experience with your body isn't reflected in actual numbers. It's always so much easier to have numbers to point to when people are asking how things are going.

[turps]

She really does give good gifts.

Strippers in space would be awesome. I just need to find my desire to write. It seems to have fled at the moment.

It must feel very frustrating when what you experience with your body isn't reflected in actual numbers. It's always so much easier to have numbers to point to when people are asking how things are going.

It is frustrating. But I'm cautiously optimistic about my next appointment.

[rikes]

Yay for red tomatoes!

So glad to hear you're feeling better. ♥♥♥♥ And that the surgeon seemed nice, always reassuring.

[turps]

I've had so many red tomatoes!

Thank you ♥

[frausorge]

You are a very kind aunt.

Also, I hope the surgery goes smoothly when the time comes, and I will make one more plug for focusing on how you feel - weight alone is such a bad indicator of anything and it's so frustrating that there's so much emphasis put on it by society/the medical establishment without any of the nuances.

[turps]

Thank you.

weight alone is such a bad indicator of anything and it's so frustrating that there's so much emphasis put on it by society/the medical establishment without any of the nuances.

Yeah, I agree with you, and I'm trying to get away from focussing on numbers when I feel so much better. Sadly the weight loss surgery programme I'm on is fixated on numbers, so that's often bleeding through.