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turpsYou know, it feels good to dust off some old stories, so I have 2 MX and 1 popslash now.
This nsync fic was actually finished, but it's bad, really bad. Thankfully![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
nopseud pointed out some things that made me see how screwed up it was. So apart from a few poor people it was never seen, and never will be. But the beginning's okay and I may expand on that later. I've just re-read the story and when I screw up I do it spectacularly.
If he could have chosen the place that realization slammed into him, Chris definitely wouldn’t have picked his car. He also wouldn’t have chosen the song that was playing -- Spicegirls Wannabe -- or the clothes he was wearing. An old t-shirt with a ripped hem and baggy jeans, a blue bandana wrapped round his forehead. But self-realization strikes when it wants, and all he could do was pull into the parking lot of a 7-11, while flipping off the drivers blaring their horns at his sudden turn.
Parking quickly Chris slumped back in his seat, eyes closed, knowing that for years to come he’d remember this moment. In his stifling hot car, back sweat dampened, Wannabe on the radio. It was just wrong. He should have been somewhere else, maybe a beach, or a club, even his own house, not here, not now. He should have been looking smooth, not like a sun-baked nobody, and Wannabe certainly shouldn’t have been playing.
Consciously relaxing himself, Chris pried his hands from the steering wheel, flexing them a little before bringing one to his mouth, nibbling at the nail. The scene was wrong in so many ways that Chris was tempted to pinch himself to see if he was dreaming, so he did, yelping at the sting. So he wasn’t dreaming. This was real. He really was sitting in his expensive car, in the grubby parking lot of a downtown 7-11. He really was next to three huge dumpsters that swarmed with flies and stank in the midday sun. He really was having a minor freak out about something he’d finally admitted to himself. He really was in love with Lance. Fuck.
It wasn’t that Chris hadn’t known he loved Lance. He’d known that for years, he loved all the guys in his own intense way. This however was different. This was the love that made you giggle -- not that Chris giggled, well maybe sometimes -- and want to make grand gestures like buying flowers and candy. Not that Chris would do that either, but he would stretch to pizza and clothes. Chris wanted to buy Lance shirts and feed him pizza, and that was unexpected. Which is why he had to stop and process a while, because Lance and him was something he hadn’t really thought about. Well except those few times in the shower, and that didn’t really count, Chris had fantasized over every one of his friends at one time or other.
The urge to bang his head against the headrest was overpowering, so Chris did. Cursing himself for being so stupid with each hit. He stopped when his head started to swim and sat quietly for a moment, waiting until the car stopped swirling and he could get his fingers back to his mouth without poking himself up the nose. It wasn’t that it was a disaster that he loved Lance. Lance was hot, Lance was his friend, Lance was someone Chris would trust with his life, but Lance was also involved. With Harvey. A giant of a man who glared daggers at Chris when no one was watching -- the ugly freakishly tall bastard. Harvey tried to pretend he liked Chris when Lance was around, but he didn’t, and Chris knew it. Not that it bothered him, Chris didn’t care who did or didn’t like him.
Harvey was everything Chris wasn’t. Tall, buff, blonde, so smooth he could slide straight into conversations without anyone noticing he was a relative stranger. Lance had been dating him for months and Chris was used to seeing them side-by-side. Everyone talked about Lance and Harvey as if the names were one -- LanceandHarvey -- and accepted him into the fold. Sometimes Chris thought he was the only one that noticed when Harvey’s eyes became cold and calculating as they talked about finance, or the way his relationship with Lance seemed stifling, as he stayed glued to his side. On occasions Chris thought JC saw something, the way his eyes would narrow as Harvey pulled Lance close in clubs, or booked vacations at the plushest resorts. But he said nothing, talking to Harvey like any other significant other of the group.
Chris had tried that tactic, but seeing how Harvey sneered when Justin wrestled with Joey on the floor, or his distain for ‘lame boyband music’ he soon gave up, letting his natural animosity free. Not that he confronted Harvey, despite Chris’ dislike he still respected Lance’s right to have the jerk as a partner, but his lack of communication was telling, and soon the others knew Chris and Harvey would never be friends.
But he was a problem, a big one. Because despite knowing that he loved Lance, no way could Chris act on it. He’d never broken up a relationship and he wasn’t going to start now. Chris sighed as he remembered how bad unrequited love sucked. Maybe this time he wouldn’t send home made cards like he’d done for the head cheerleader at one of his high schools. But he could deal, he always did.
Mini freak out over, Chris started the engine and pulled out of the car lot. He was late for rehearsal now, and that meant a pissy Wade. Which ordinarily would be a bad thing but maybe Wade’s shouting would drive thoughts of loving Lance from his head, all he could do was hope.
~*~*~*~
It was a vain hope, Chris knew it as soon as he walked into rehearsal and saw the other guys already warming up. Muttering an insincere sorry at Wade, Chris dropped his towel and water bottle near the wall and bent down to tie a loose shoelace. Then sprang back up when his bent over stance placed him at the perfect eye level to see Lance’s ass. Pressing his hands across his eyes Chris waited for a moment, letting the darkness replace the memory of that perfect ass. That round firm ass that he wanted to squeeze, that ass that probably had property of Harvey tattooed on it.
“Chris. Are you okay?”
Hands spread, Chris peered at Lance through his fingers. Lance was looking at him, in fact everyone in the room was looking at him, but at least they were standing still, Lance was coming closer, much closer, in fact soon he’d be close enough to touch, and that just couldn’t happen. Chris needed to take evasive action, and fast.
“Fine, I’m fine…just have a headache, eyes hurting that’s all. Just going to get some Aspirin, I’ll be back in a minute.”
Words spilling from his mouth as he practically ran from the room, Chris ignored the looks of the others as he barged back thorough the door he’d entered only minutes before. On instinct he made for the bathroom that had both painkillers and a lockable door. Safely inside he turned the lock, knowing he’d have company within seconds, company he really didn’t want to talk to, especially if it answered to the name of Lance. Filling a glass with water, Chris blindly opened the medicine cabinet, aiming for the Aspirins without hesitation. Years of hangovers and injuries meant that every one of them could find what they needed blindfolded. Pills popped Chris threw them into his mouth, washing them down with the water before sitting on the side of the tub, waiting to see who had followed.
“Chris.”
Justin, it figured. Relieved that it wasn’t Lance behind the door, Chris stood and stared at himself in the mirror, checking to see if he looked as freaked out as he felt, before letting Justin in. His reflection stared back, totally unchanged, which sucked really. The realization that he loved Lance should have shown in his face somehow, he should have looked like a man in turmoil, in the midst of unrequited love. Instead he looked exactly the same as he did when he’d run out of his house hours before.
Inspection over and door unlocked, Chris summoned a smile before Justin could see him.
“You okay?”
“I’m fine. Just over indulged last night.” The lie slipped out easily and Chris relaxed as Justin stopped looking concerned and began to laugh.
“You’re getting old… and stupid. Drinking before rehearsal’s not cool.”
“Your turn to be the grown-up today Jup?”
“Someone has to be...” Grinning, Justin pushed Chris along the corridor “…and my grown-up advice to you is get back in there before Wade strokes out.”
His mood dipping quickly at the thought of a red faced Wade, Chris tried to stop, then yelped as Justin kept on moving grabbing his wrist as he walked past, and towing him along.
“Come *on* Chris, you’ll feel better soon, and everyone’s waiting.”
Chris decided within seconds that it would be both useless and undignified to try and stop Justin pulling him along. Justin was bigger and stronger than him now, and Chris didn’t relish the idea of being dragged along like a child. Not that the reasoning made it any easier to keep walking back towards Lance, especially when Justin still had tight hold of his wrist. Reaching the door Chris was about to go inside when Justin stopped and tuned to face him.
“You sure you’re okay? I can explain to Wade if you want to go home.”
“Explain what? That I’m hung over? That would go over well.”
“I’d tell him you were sick you idiot.”
Quickly Chris tried to decide if taking up Justin’s offer was a good thing or not. On one hand he’d put off seeing Lance for a while. On the other he’d have to see him sometime and they really did need to rehearse. “No, I’m good.” Smiling to show he meant it Chris took a deep breath and entered the studio. It was going to be a long day.
Next two MXs that have stalled. I seem to have more MX WIPs than any other kind, but I'll only force two on you.
Watching was something that Jesse was becoming an expert at. Nearly every hour of every day he would watch something, Proxy Blue, the dancers at a night club, Adam working in the lab. Yet lately he’d found his attention being pulled to one thing only. Jesse could be sitting at the computer, supposedly searching the new mutant database, in reality he was focussed on something past the display, or should he say, someone.
Over the last few months Jesse had become dismayed as he realised he’d do anything to get close to Brennan Mulwray, the former thief turned Mutant X member. Fights in the dojo, nights out dancing, even making breakfast would be better when Brennan was with him. Jesse knew everything there was to know about Brennan’s routine, when he woke, when he ate, the books he read, the clothes he wore. Everything had been observed and taken in to be absorbed later.
Sometimes Jesse thought that he was only a few inches away from being a stalker, but that was a small concern when he had to get his Brennan fix. Every morning he’d make sure to be up first, listening at his door, until he could hear movement from the next bedroom. As soon as he heard footsteps Jesse would slip from his room, and just ‘happened’ to be walking to breakfast as Brennan stumbled from his room, sleepy eyed, for his first cup of coffee of the day. There were a lot of these ‘chance’ meetings, and sometimes Jesse was sure that Brennan knew what he was doing, yet so far nothing had been said, no action pointed out. So for now, Jesse would just do what he was doing, lust after Brennan, while berating himself for falling for a guy.
~*~*~*~
“Hey, morning Jesse”
“Looking sharp there Brennan.”
Jesse laughed as Brennan flipped him the bird while making for the kitchen, eyes mostly shut. The elementals hair was standing up in clumped spikes, which combined with the sleeping uniform of boxers and a tee made Brennan look far from his usual self. He looked rumpled, dishevelled but so damn sexy that it was all that Jesse could do not to jump him right there in the hall. This obsession with Brennan had been going on for weeks now, building up until all Jesse seemed to do was work, watch Brennan and jerk off at every opportunity.
It was a punishing schedule, made more so by the state of utter confusion Jesse was existing in. Brennan was straight; so he was off limits, simple as that. When dating Jesse stuck to a set of rules, rules he’d invented himself, rules that had so far never let him down. Right on top of that list was the most important. Never hit on a straight guy -- ever.
Jesse was comfortable with his sexual preference, always had been. Ever since he’d watched re-runs of Batman and decided both Catwoman *and* Batman were hot he’d lusted after, dated and eventually slept with both men and women. It wasn’t that important a deal in his life. His dad had known, and had said nothing beyond the patented ‘be careful’ speech -- at least when he was around. Shalimar knew, they’d spent many happy hours watching the talent walk by at the mall, and Adam -- well Adam knew everything.
His sexuality just hadn’t been important in terms of Mutant X, until Brennan had sauntered into his life. Now it seemed sex was the only thing he could think about, and it was driving Jesse insane.
Sometimes, lying on his bed -- softening cock in his hand -- come dripping down his leg. Jesse felt about thirteen, when anything and everything would give him a hard on. But he’d grown up, learned to control his own body. That was until he’d first set eyes on Brennan. Then that control had started to slip, until, now his control was almost non-excistant.
He’d become a master of disguise, a file held in front of his lap, sitting with a cushion on his knee when they watched movies. Vest tops had been banished to the back of his closet, swapped for long sweaters that skimmed his hips, and baggy jeans that covered a multitude of sins. It was like an insane game, as Jesse fought to keep living normally when in reality he was going quietly mad. Death by lust overload, it wasn’t how he’d expected to go, but it was looking more likely every day.
Entering the kitchen, Jesse quickly slid into a chair before Brennan turned from the coffee machine. Seeing the elemental so sleepy and rumpled was making his cock twitch, his libedo surging to the surface again. He needed a distraction - any distraction. “I’ll have mine black.” Okay, so that was lame, but at least Brennan was turning to face him. No more looking at that firm ass outlined with those short boxers.
“Lost control of your legs have you?” answered Brennan, but still reached for Jesse’s mug from the cupboard above him.
Okay, so that was a bad move.
It was hot, humid, muggy- air heavy and oppressive. The air conditioning didn’t seem to be making a dent in the stifling heat, causing everyone at Sanctuary to become irritable, quick to snap at the slightest thing. Tempers frayed and tension rose as the temperature kept rising. It should have been cool in the mountain -- but wasn’t.
They dealt with it in their own way, keeping away from one another, afraid that one wrong word would start yet another petty argument. Adam took refuge in the lab, running test after test, seemingly ignoring the heat. Only the sweat-stained shirt gave him away, he was as hot as anyone, just wouldn’t admit it.
Shalimar lay curled in the grass outside of Sanctuary, basking in the sun. The slight wind rippled her hair as she lay, eyes closed, a small smile on her face.
Emma sat crossed legged in front of the waterfall, meditating, leaving the heat behind mentally if not physically.
Jesse was nowhere to be seen, storming out of Sanctuary hours before. He and Brennan had been rubbing each other the wrong way all day, on the verge of an argument, a screaming match that could severely hamper their relationship. Finally, after yet another sarcastic remark, Jesse had stood up and left, leaving Brennan irritable and pissed off.
Now -- hours later -- Brennan lay on his bed, listless, unmoving, thinking about the hurtful words that he and Jesse had thrown at one another. He was hot and uncomfortable, despite stripping down to cut offs and a vest top. Brennan could feel the material clinging to his skin, clammy against his chest and back. His hair stuck to his forehead, but he was too listless to push it aside, resigned to just lying still on his bed, in his room, alone.
The last few days had been a nightmare of raised voices and petty annoyances. Brennan had found himself having to walk from a room, to avoid arguments on more than one occasion. After two weeks of relentless heat the whole team was suffering, and still there was no end in sight, the forecast predicting heat and more heat. Brennan was sure he wasn’t the only one longing to jump in the Helix and fly somewhere cool, but Adam had nixed that idea. Just because it was hot it didn’t mean they could just take off, new mutants still needed help what ever the weather.
Fantasising about cool breezes and cold air, it took Brennan a few moments to realise that someone was in his room, standing quietly in the corner. Mentally groaning at having to deal with another person, he began to shift on the bed.
“Don’t move, don’t say anything, just listen.”
Brennan froze in place. From the first word he knew who was standing there, but the tone; Jesse had never sounded like this before, so stern and uncompromising. It was a voice that had to be obeyed, so Brennan did just that.
“Good. I’ve things I want to say, and I want you to listen to me, no answering, no remarks. Say anything before I’m done and I’m outta here, you understand?”
Nodding his head, Brennan silently agreed, slightly awed at the power and confidence that Jesse was displaying.
“We’ve had problems these last few weeks, big problems. Before I go on I want you to know that I love you as much as ever, that doesn’t change. But all we’ve done lately is niggle at one another, and I’m sick of it. The heat’s the biggest problem, but we have to find a way to work round that or everything we’ve worked so hard for will be undermined. I’m not gonna let that happen.” Walking closer to the bed, Jesse stared down at Brennan, a small smile on his face. “We’re both going crazy with tension, and there’s been no way to let it out. We haven’t even slept together it’s been so hot. That’s not good, we need to reconnect, work out some energy, and I’ve the perfect way. I’ve wanted to try this for a while, but never brought it up, too scared I suppose. I went to a shop I’d heard about this afternoon, bought some things that looked interesting. I want to try them on you. Can I do that Brennan? Do you trust me enough?”
The atmosphere seemed charged with energy, as Jesse stood over Brennan, totally calm and collected. To Brennan, still lying supine on his bed, the other man looked powerful and confident, looming over him. Jesse appeared so controlled, so masterful. It was a look that he didn’t see that often, but right now, it was the hottest thing that he could ever imagine. Did he trust Jesse? Yeah he did, totally.
“You can speak now Bren.”
And that's it. You can relax, no more shameful WIPs will be aired out *g*
This nsync fic was actually finished, but it's bad, really bad. Thankfully
nopseud pointed out some things that made me see how screwed up it was. So apart from a few poor people it was never seen, and never will be. But the beginning's okay and I may expand on that later. I've just re-read the story and when I screw up I do it spectacularly.If he could have chosen the place that realization slammed into him, Chris definitely wouldn’t have picked his car. He also wouldn’t have chosen the song that was playing -- Spicegirls Wannabe -- or the clothes he was wearing. An old t-shirt with a ripped hem and baggy jeans, a blue bandana wrapped round his forehead. But self-realization strikes when it wants, and all he could do was pull into the parking lot of a 7-11, while flipping off the drivers blaring their horns at his sudden turn.
Parking quickly Chris slumped back in his seat, eyes closed, knowing that for years to come he’d remember this moment. In his stifling hot car, back sweat dampened, Wannabe on the radio. It was just wrong. He should have been somewhere else, maybe a beach, or a club, even his own house, not here, not now. He should have been looking smooth, not like a sun-baked nobody, and Wannabe certainly shouldn’t have been playing.
Consciously relaxing himself, Chris pried his hands from the steering wheel, flexing them a little before bringing one to his mouth, nibbling at the nail. The scene was wrong in so many ways that Chris was tempted to pinch himself to see if he was dreaming, so he did, yelping at the sting. So he wasn’t dreaming. This was real. He really was sitting in his expensive car, in the grubby parking lot of a downtown 7-11. He really was next to three huge dumpsters that swarmed with flies and stank in the midday sun. He really was having a minor freak out about something he’d finally admitted to himself. He really was in love with Lance. Fuck.
It wasn’t that Chris hadn’t known he loved Lance. He’d known that for years, he loved all the guys in his own intense way. This however was different. This was the love that made you giggle -- not that Chris giggled, well maybe sometimes -- and want to make grand gestures like buying flowers and candy. Not that Chris would do that either, but he would stretch to pizza and clothes. Chris wanted to buy Lance shirts and feed him pizza, and that was unexpected. Which is why he had to stop and process a while, because Lance and him was something he hadn’t really thought about. Well except those few times in the shower, and that didn’t really count, Chris had fantasized over every one of his friends at one time or other.
The urge to bang his head against the headrest was overpowering, so Chris did. Cursing himself for being so stupid with each hit. He stopped when his head started to swim and sat quietly for a moment, waiting until the car stopped swirling and he could get his fingers back to his mouth without poking himself up the nose. It wasn’t that it was a disaster that he loved Lance. Lance was hot, Lance was his friend, Lance was someone Chris would trust with his life, but Lance was also involved. With Harvey. A giant of a man who glared daggers at Chris when no one was watching -- the ugly freakishly tall bastard. Harvey tried to pretend he liked Chris when Lance was around, but he didn’t, and Chris knew it. Not that it bothered him, Chris didn’t care who did or didn’t like him.
Harvey was everything Chris wasn’t. Tall, buff, blonde, so smooth he could slide straight into conversations without anyone noticing he was a relative stranger. Lance had been dating him for months and Chris was used to seeing them side-by-side. Everyone talked about Lance and Harvey as if the names were one -- LanceandHarvey -- and accepted him into the fold. Sometimes Chris thought he was the only one that noticed when Harvey’s eyes became cold and calculating as they talked about finance, or the way his relationship with Lance seemed stifling, as he stayed glued to his side. On occasions Chris thought JC saw something, the way his eyes would narrow as Harvey pulled Lance close in clubs, or booked vacations at the plushest resorts. But he said nothing, talking to Harvey like any other significant other of the group.
Chris had tried that tactic, but seeing how Harvey sneered when Justin wrestled with Joey on the floor, or his distain for ‘lame boyband music’ he soon gave up, letting his natural animosity free. Not that he confronted Harvey, despite Chris’ dislike he still respected Lance’s right to have the jerk as a partner, but his lack of communication was telling, and soon the others knew Chris and Harvey would never be friends.
But he was a problem, a big one. Because despite knowing that he loved Lance, no way could Chris act on it. He’d never broken up a relationship and he wasn’t going to start now. Chris sighed as he remembered how bad unrequited love sucked. Maybe this time he wouldn’t send home made cards like he’d done for the head cheerleader at one of his high schools. But he could deal, he always did.
Mini freak out over, Chris started the engine and pulled out of the car lot. He was late for rehearsal now, and that meant a pissy Wade. Which ordinarily would be a bad thing but maybe Wade’s shouting would drive thoughts of loving Lance from his head, all he could do was hope.
~*~*~*~
It was a vain hope, Chris knew it as soon as he walked into rehearsal and saw the other guys already warming up. Muttering an insincere sorry at Wade, Chris dropped his towel and water bottle near the wall and bent down to tie a loose shoelace. Then sprang back up when his bent over stance placed him at the perfect eye level to see Lance’s ass. Pressing his hands across his eyes Chris waited for a moment, letting the darkness replace the memory of that perfect ass. That round firm ass that he wanted to squeeze, that ass that probably had property of Harvey tattooed on it.
“Chris. Are you okay?”
Hands spread, Chris peered at Lance through his fingers. Lance was looking at him, in fact everyone in the room was looking at him, but at least they were standing still, Lance was coming closer, much closer, in fact soon he’d be close enough to touch, and that just couldn’t happen. Chris needed to take evasive action, and fast.
“Fine, I’m fine…just have a headache, eyes hurting that’s all. Just going to get some Aspirin, I’ll be back in a minute.”
Words spilling from his mouth as he practically ran from the room, Chris ignored the looks of the others as he barged back thorough the door he’d entered only minutes before. On instinct he made for the bathroom that had both painkillers and a lockable door. Safely inside he turned the lock, knowing he’d have company within seconds, company he really didn’t want to talk to, especially if it answered to the name of Lance. Filling a glass with water, Chris blindly opened the medicine cabinet, aiming for the Aspirins without hesitation. Years of hangovers and injuries meant that every one of them could find what they needed blindfolded. Pills popped Chris threw them into his mouth, washing them down with the water before sitting on the side of the tub, waiting to see who had followed.
“Chris.”
Justin, it figured. Relieved that it wasn’t Lance behind the door, Chris stood and stared at himself in the mirror, checking to see if he looked as freaked out as he felt, before letting Justin in. His reflection stared back, totally unchanged, which sucked really. The realization that he loved Lance should have shown in his face somehow, he should have looked like a man in turmoil, in the midst of unrequited love. Instead he looked exactly the same as he did when he’d run out of his house hours before.
Inspection over and door unlocked, Chris summoned a smile before Justin could see him.
“You okay?”
“I’m fine. Just over indulged last night.” The lie slipped out easily and Chris relaxed as Justin stopped looking concerned and began to laugh.
“You’re getting old… and stupid. Drinking before rehearsal’s not cool.”
“Your turn to be the grown-up today Jup?”
“Someone has to be...” Grinning, Justin pushed Chris along the corridor “…and my grown-up advice to you is get back in there before Wade strokes out.”
His mood dipping quickly at the thought of a red faced Wade, Chris tried to stop, then yelped as Justin kept on moving grabbing his wrist as he walked past, and towing him along.
“Come *on* Chris, you’ll feel better soon, and everyone’s waiting.”
Chris decided within seconds that it would be both useless and undignified to try and stop Justin pulling him along. Justin was bigger and stronger than him now, and Chris didn’t relish the idea of being dragged along like a child. Not that the reasoning made it any easier to keep walking back towards Lance, especially when Justin still had tight hold of his wrist. Reaching the door Chris was about to go inside when Justin stopped and tuned to face him.
“You sure you’re okay? I can explain to Wade if you want to go home.”
“Explain what? That I’m hung over? That would go over well.”
“I’d tell him you were sick you idiot.”
Quickly Chris tried to decide if taking up Justin’s offer was a good thing or not. On one hand he’d put off seeing Lance for a while. On the other he’d have to see him sometime and they really did need to rehearse. “No, I’m good.” Smiling to show he meant it Chris took a deep breath and entered the studio. It was going to be a long day.
Next two MXs that have stalled. I seem to have more MX WIPs than any other kind, but I'll only force two on you.
Watching was something that Jesse was becoming an expert at. Nearly every hour of every day he would watch something, Proxy Blue, the dancers at a night club, Adam working in the lab. Yet lately he’d found his attention being pulled to one thing only. Jesse could be sitting at the computer, supposedly searching the new mutant database, in reality he was focussed on something past the display, or should he say, someone.
Over the last few months Jesse had become dismayed as he realised he’d do anything to get close to Brennan Mulwray, the former thief turned Mutant X member. Fights in the dojo, nights out dancing, even making breakfast would be better when Brennan was with him. Jesse knew everything there was to know about Brennan’s routine, when he woke, when he ate, the books he read, the clothes he wore. Everything had been observed and taken in to be absorbed later.
Sometimes Jesse thought that he was only a few inches away from being a stalker, but that was a small concern when he had to get his Brennan fix. Every morning he’d make sure to be up first, listening at his door, until he could hear movement from the next bedroom. As soon as he heard footsteps Jesse would slip from his room, and just ‘happened’ to be walking to breakfast as Brennan stumbled from his room, sleepy eyed, for his first cup of coffee of the day. There were a lot of these ‘chance’ meetings, and sometimes Jesse was sure that Brennan knew what he was doing, yet so far nothing had been said, no action pointed out. So for now, Jesse would just do what he was doing, lust after Brennan, while berating himself for falling for a guy.
~*~*~*~
“Hey, morning Jesse”
“Looking sharp there Brennan.”
Jesse laughed as Brennan flipped him the bird while making for the kitchen, eyes mostly shut. The elementals hair was standing up in clumped spikes, which combined with the sleeping uniform of boxers and a tee made Brennan look far from his usual self. He looked rumpled, dishevelled but so damn sexy that it was all that Jesse could do not to jump him right there in the hall. This obsession with Brennan had been going on for weeks now, building up until all Jesse seemed to do was work, watch Brennan and jerk off at every opportunity.
It was a punishing schedule, made more so by the state of utter confusion Jesse was existing in. Brennan was straight; so he was off limits, simple as that. When dating Jesse stuck to a set of rules, rules he’d invented himself, rules that had so far never let him down. Right on top of that list was the most important. Never hit on a straight guy -- ever.
Jesse was comfortable with his sexual preference, always had been. Ever since he’d watched re-runs of Batman and decided both Catwoman *and* Batman were hot he’d lusted after, dated and eventually slept with both men and women. It wasn’t that important a deal in his life. His dad had known, and had said nothing beyond the patented ‘be careful’ speech -- at least when he was around. Shalimar knew, they’d spent many happy hours watching the talent walk by at the mall, and Adam -- well Adam knew everything.
His sexuality just hadn’t been important in terms of Mutant X, until Brennan had sauntered into his life. Now it seemed sex was the only thing he could think about, and it was driving Jesse insane.
Sometimes, lying on his bed -- softening cock in his hand -- come dripping down his leg. Jesse felt about thirteen, when anything and everything would give him a hard on. But he’d grown up, learned to control his own body. That was until he’d first set eyes on Brennan. Then that control had started to slip, until, now his control was almost non-excistant.
He’d become a master of disguise, a file held in front of his lap, sitting with a cushion on his knee when they watched movies. Vest tops had been banished to the back of his closet, swapped for long sweaters that skimmed his hips, and baggy jeans that covered a multitude of sins. It was like an insane game, as Jesse fought to keep living normally when in reality he was going quietly mad. Death by lust overload, it wasn’t how he’d expected to go, but it was looking more likely every day.
Entering the kitchen, Jesse quickly slid into a chair before Brennan turned from the coffee machine. Seeing the elemental so sleepy and rumpled was making his cock twitch, his libedo surging to the surface again. He needed a distraction - any distraction. “I’ll have mine black.” Okay, so that was lame, but at least Brennan was turning to face him. No more looking at that firm ass outlined with those short boxers.
“Lost control of your legs have you?” answered Brennan, but still reached for Jesse’s mug from the cupboard above him.
Okay, so that was a bad move.
It was hot, humid, muggy- air heavy and oppressive. The air conditioning didn’t seem to be making a dent in the stifling heat, causing everyone at Sanctuary to become irritable, quick to snap at the slightest thing. Tempers frayed and tension rose as the temperature kept rising. It should have been cool in the mountain -- but wasn’t.
They dealt with it in their own way, keeping away from one another, afraid that one wrong word would start yet another petty argument. Adam took refuge in the lab, running test after test, seemingly ignoring the heat. Only the sweat-stained shirt gave him away, he was as hot as anyone, just wouldn’t admit it.
Shalimar lay curled in the grass outside of Sanctuary, basking in the sun. The slight wind rippled her hair as she lay, eyes closed, a small smile on her face.
Emma sat crossed legged in front of the waterfall, meditating, leaving the heat behind mentally if not physically.
Jesse was nowhere to be seen, storming out of Sanctuary hours before. He and Brennan had been rubbing each other the wrong way all day, on the verge of an argument, a screaming match that could severely hamper their relationship. Finally, after yet another sarcastic remark, Jesse had stood up and left, leaving Brennan irritable and pissed off.
Now -- hours later -- Brennan lay on his bed, listless, unmoving, thinking about the hurtful words that he and Jesse had thrown at one another. He was hot and uncomfortable, despite stripping down to cut offs and a vest top. Brennan could feel the material clinging to his skin, clammy against his chest and back. His hair stuck to his forehead, but he was too listless to push it aside, resigned to just lying still on his bed, in his room, alone.
The last few days had been a nightmare of raised voices and petty annoyances. Brennan had found himself having to walk from a room, to avoid arguments on more than one occasion. After two weeks of relentless heat the whole team was suffering, and still there was no end in sight, the forecast predicting heat and more heat. Brennan was sure he wasn’t the only one longing to jump in the Helix and fly somewhere cool, but Adam had nixed that idea. Just because it was hot it didn’t mean they could just take off, new mutants still needed help what ever the weather.
Fantasising about cool breezes and cold air, it took Brennan a few moments to realise that someone was in his room, standing quietly in the corner. Mentally groaning at having to deal with another person, he began to shift on the bed.
“Don’t move, don’t say anything, just listen.”
Brennan froze in place. From the first word he knew who was standing there, but the tone; Jesse had never sounded like this before, so stern and uncompromising. It was a voice that had to be obeyed, so Brennan did just that.
“Good. I’ve things I want to say, and I want you to listen to me, no answering, no remarks. Say anything before I’m done and I’m outta here, you understand?”
Nodding his head, Brennan silently agreed, slightly awed at the power and confidence that Jesse was displaying.
“We’ve had problems these last few weeks, big problems. Before I go on I want you to know that I love you as much as ever, that doesn’t change. But all we’ve done lately is niggle at one another, and I’m sick of it. The heat’s the biggest problem, but we have to find a way to work round that or everything we’ve worked so hard for will be undermined. I’m not gonna let that happen.” Walking closer to the bed, Jesse stared down at Brennan, a small smile on his face. “We’re both going crazy with tension, and there’s been no way to let it out. We haven’t even slept together it’s been so hot. That’s not good, we need to reconnect, work out some energy, and I’ve the perfect way. I’ve wanted to try this for a while, but never brought it up, too scared I suppose. I went to a shop I’d heard about this afternoon, bought some things that looked interesting. I want to try them on you. Can I do that Brennan? Do you trust me enough?”
The atmosphere seemed charged with energy, as Jesse stood over Brennan, totally calm and collected. To Brennan, still lying supine on his bed, the other man looked powerful and confident, looming over him. Jesse appeared so controlled, so masterful. It was a look that he didn’t see that often, but right now, it was the hottest thing that he could ever imagine. Did he trust Jesse? Yeah he did, totally.
“You can speak now Bren.”
And that's it. You can relax, no more shameful WIPs will be aired out *g*
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Date: 2004-02-06 09:49 am (UTC)Re:
Date: 2004-02-06 01:05 pm (UTC)He looks so good with a baby doesn't he!