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Jan. 3rd, 2019 09:19 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
turpsMy MiL ended up being taken to hospital in an ambulance yesterday. I suspected it was coming, we'd been there earlier in the day to take some black bags of rubbish to the dump for my SiL and my MiL's breathing was terrible. The problem is, she's so incredibly stubborn and said she'd go to the doctor today when she plainly wasn't well at all. My SiL and her partner both said they'd call for an ambulance if she got worse, so that was the best we could leave it at.
We went to the dump, had a phone call to say our new car was at the garage getting adapted, so drove past there so James could take some photos of it and get to know Clem a little, if only from the outside. Which is when Kayleigh phoned to say she'd been signed off from work for a fortnight - which I also knew was coming. Went home and I packed away all the Christmas stuff, got James off to work, hoovered the fake pine needles that were everywhere and cleaned the windows of fake snow. Then settled down for some online time with the house pleasingly clean and tidy. Then my SiL's partner phoned saying they'd called an ambulance for my MiL as she'd deteriorated big time.
Obviously James was at work by then so I sent him a message and settled down to wait for more news. Which is when I read and fed the bandom holidays works, which was an excellent distraction. Long story short, I told James and his work allowed him to come home, he picked me up and we went to the hospital where for the people waiting in triage it was an 8 hour wait, but thankfully not as long for my MiL, though she did end up lying on a trolley in a corridor for three hours waiting for a room. But, at least she was warm, had meds and oxygen.
She's where she needs to be now -- though I remain frustrated that if she'd gone to the doctor when she first started to feel ill this could have been nipped in the bud. I'm also frustrated that she pretty much lives in squalor and won't allow anyone to help with that. My in laws have had no lights in the kitchen for years but won't get it fixed, using a lamp instead. But more seriously, the thermostat on their heating has been broken for nearly two years, so they just don't use it, and in fact where talking about getting the gas cut off as they don't use any gas. My FiL keeps saying it'll be a £100 fix, but they won't arrange the fix or let anyone else pay for it. Instead sitting under blankets in a damp freezing house when they both have health issues. I swear, I could bash my head off the nearest wall at times when I think about their living situation.
We'll be going to the hospital later, but for now I'm going to catch up online, drink many cups of coffee and be grateful for my SiLs partner who ignored my MiL and phoned for an ambulance, otherwise the outcome could have been so much different.
We went to the dump, had a phone call to say our new car was at the garage getting adapted, so drove past there so James could take some photos of it and get to know Clem a little, if only from the outside. Which is when Kayleigh phoned to say she'd been signed off from work for a fortnight - which I also knew was coming. Went home and I packed away all the Christmas stuff, got James off to work, hoovered the fake pine needles that were everywhere and cleaned the windows of fake snow. Then settled down for some online time with the house pleasingly clean and tidy. Then my SiL's partner phoned saying they'd called an ambulance for my MiL as she'd deteriorated big time.
Obviously James was at work by then so I sent him a message and settled down to wait for more news. Which is when I read and fed the bandom holidays works, which was an excellent distraction. Long story short, I told James and his work allowed him to come home, he picked me up and we went to the hospital where for the people waiting in triage it was an 8 hour wait, but thankfully not as long for my MiL, though she did end up lying on a trolley in a corridor for three hours waiting for a room. But, at least she was warm, had meds and oxygen.
She's where she needs to be now -- though I remain frustrated that if she'd gone to the doctor when she first started to feel ill this could have been nipped in the bud. I'm also frustrated that she pretty much lives in squalor and won't allow anyone to help with that. My in laws have had no lights in the kitchen for years but won't get it fixed, using a lamp instead. But more seriously, the thermostat on their heating has been broken for nearly two years, so they just don't use it, and in fact where talking about getting the gas cut off as they don't use any gas. My FiL keeps saying it'll be a £100 fix, but they won't arrange the fix or let anyone else pay for it. Instead sitting under blankets in a damp freezing house when they both have health issues. I swear, I could bash my head off the nearest wall at times when I think about their living situation.
We'll be going to the hospital later, but for now I'm going to catch up online, drink many cups of coffee and be grateful for my SiLs partner who ignored my MiL and phoned for an ambulance, otherwise the outcome could have been so much different.
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Date: 2019-01-03 10:18 am (UTC)I feel you on the living in squalor thing. I understand how people get caught in a rut, I do too, but you gotta at least try to make it better.
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Date: 2019-01-03 10:40 am (UTC)It's the heating situation that frustrates me the most. The dirt and clutter isn't such a big issue but she's got breathing issues and heart troubles, being warm should be a priority.
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Date: 2019-01-03 11:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-01-03 02:29 pm (UTC)Families man, they're a worry.
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Date: 2019-01-03 04:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-01-03 04:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-01-03 04:14 pm (UTC)Maybe you could get the thermostat sorted out while she's in hospital? Could you enlist the help of a doctor to tell them it's important for her to have heating to be able to go home sooner? When my MIL was still living alone we could usually get her to agree to do something by getting an authority figure like that involved.
It's so frustrating when people older people start to lose the ability to make good decisions for themselves. Sometimes you just need to grab the reins and go ahead with what needs to be done even over their protests.
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Date: 2019-01-03 04:50 pm (UTC)My inlaws house is a disaster zone, and it really isn't safe for them. Especially so in terms of the heating, my MiL has such terrible chest problems and as she's immobile she can't move around so she's pretty much just sitting and huddling under a blanket.
I suspect she's embarrassed at the state of the house, but no one should have to be cold in their own home.
When my MIL was still living alone we could usually get her to agree to do something by getting an authority figure like that involved.
Mam was the same. She wouldn't listen to me or Kayleigh, but her doctor could talk her into anything. Which was handy at times. But was still frustrating.
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Date: 2019-01-03 05:05 pm (UTC)I think that in parents' minds we're all still six years old, and so what do we possibly know? :-)
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Date: 2019-01-03 04:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-01-03 04:54 pm (UTC)I just wish they'd accept help, especially with the heating. They could have a lovely comfortable house but instead it's cluttered and cold. I think we will have to push this time, because they can't go on like they are.
At least my SIL and her partner are on the ball now and ignored my MILs protests about the ambulance. If she had her way she'd have hung on and got even worse.
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Date: 2019-01-03 07:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-01-04 10:01 am (UTC)Thankfully she's getting better, but is on oxygen and heavy duty antibiotics for a nasty chest infection. Going back home to that cold damp house would not be a good thing.
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Date: 2019-01-05 05:42 am (UTC)I hope your MiL is feeling at least a little better by now! And I hope their heating situation can be resolved soon -- a damp, freezing house can't possibly be good for someone with respiratory issues.
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Date: 2019-01-05 10:03 am (UTC)Thankfully my SiL's partner has decided to sort out the heating issue and is just going to go ahead and get it fixed. I think it really scared them to see her rushed in again and hopefully this sucky situation will lead to some good changes.
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Date: 2019-01-05 07:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-01-06 10:01 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-01-06 05:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-01-07 09:39 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2019-01-07 06:18 am (UTC)Meanwhile, I also hope the new car will serve James well.
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Date: 2019-01-07 08:31 am (UTC)I'm so glad someone is stepping in.
The new car should be here at some point this week. It'll be sad to see the old one go, but a new shiny is always nice.